Becoming of Age Draft

I’m walking down unfamiliar but beautiful territory with my out-of-the-box shoes, and new bag. I can’t help but clutch dearly unto the blue material that hangs close to me. I try to stride coolly tilting my head up hoping that people don’t look at me funny. I scold myself, “I can do it! Calm down, its only your first day.” Indeed it is, but I can’t help but feel anxious, anticipating the next classes where I’ll meet the people that will be with me throughout my high school career. An irritating ring fills the crisp summer air reminding me how at this time, I could be sleeping. Before I could take a look at my schedule the sound of hundreds of student’s footsteps resound. I make my way quickly on the side so that I don’t embarrassingly block the way. I find out my classroom and I stride, stride.

I open the door and air-conditioned air brushes my face. I see a couple of people in their seats, no one close to each other conversing. I slowly walk over to an empty table and I see a short Japanese lady smiling at me. I smile back greeting her nervously— she’s probably my CAP teacher. I take a good look at the people in the room, like everyone else they’re just sitting there. Thinking. Maybe they were thinking about if they were going to make friends. Wait, they probably have friends and I’m the only one who’s talking to myself like this. I take out my schedule trying to look busy.  I never really had to make friends all my life, until this day. I grew up with the same people and everyone was friendly. Social skills: I have them but being in a new environment and new people, I get self aware of how I speak and how I look.

“Class! Welcome to your CAP class you’ll be having this class for your four years in high school…” My mind drifts, “Four years, I wonder if there’s anyone here who I’ll end up hanging with. That’s if I’m not scared to start a conversation.” The teacher interrupts my thoughts, “Okay, we’re going to head to the gym where we’re going to have an assembly with the sophomores.” 

As I walk into the gym with my class, there are tons of people. I squirm my way unto the bleachers people left and right bumping me and conversation is all I hear. I sit in the minimal ventilated room and listen to my thoughts. I have to start a conversation. I look to the right to me and there’s a girl next to me, I remember she’s my CAP. She was on her phone or something. I have to do something that I’ve never done before. “Just say hi, my goodness.” But all at once all my thoughts and fears come down on me. What if she thinks I’m weird? What if I can’t carry on the conversation? What if there’s something on my face? I wipe my face. “Just do it Adara, no big deal. You’ll regret it if you don’t”. “Hi, you’re in my CAP right? I’m Adara.” The girl stares at me blankly, and then turns into a smile. “Hey! I’m Alex.” I finally did it! “Cool.” …Now what? “So, what school did you come from?” I think quickly. Very smart, she probably went to Salt Lake. “Actually I’m from Aiea and I went to Aliamanu.” “So how’d you get your G.E.?” I ask eagerly. I was actually getting somewhere. “I’m in this thing called meneMAC.” A light bulb lights up. I start to get excited. “Really?! Me too!” And the rest was history.

From this event on forward I started to develop into a different and better kind of person. I started to slowly become comfortable and confident with myself. I can introduce and talk to new people. I came a more independent person because I was alone. I learned that if you put away your doubts and worries and go for the things you want, you will far.